Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Hey, Vinnie.

Mind updating your blog in a little while, Vinnie? You're starting to make me look like an idiot for saying "Oooh, he'll update soon!" I mean, what are you waiting for? An invitation?

... Oh, sorry! I keep forgetting you have readers. Hi. Well, this is awkward. Name's SID. Yes, that's all uppercase, thanks. Write that down. No? Oh... okay. I'll just, uh... Continue.

Ahem. Let me try again!

Yeeee-haaaw-- No.

How's it going, bros -- Nah.

Look. Just hi. Name's SID, and I'm here to stay. Not as this blog's main writer - that'll be your host (pfft), Vincent Karrel - but as your guest commentator! So, lets see what we've got here.

Oooh, Vincent, you're so bad! Putting a girl's diary online... How could youuuu?

Hey, don't knock the serial killer. He was a nice guy. Was.

She got pregnant? William, you dog!

Daniel seems like such a nice guy. Not a Nice Guy like you, Vincent, but nice in the sense that he's the kind of guy I can count on to kidnap a child that was just born. *claps*

Look, I know you don't like Sarah or Lois. That's a given. But don't shout out how "That's not how reality works! Boohoo!" You have no idea how reality works, you get me? Well, maybe you do now with Smokestack inside you. Oh, screw you, Vincent.

I hope you enjoyed your nightly walks into enemy territory, Vinnie!

Oh, Vivian. Vivian, Vivian, Vivian. You're such a strange case, aren't you? D'aaaawww. Well, you'll lose everything eventually - especially when they get their hands(?) on you. Everything that makes you human... gone, in the blink of an eye! Sometimes, we wear masks to give us a trace of humanity. It... doesn't always work, of course, and it's become quite a... oh, what's the word... a staple! Yeah! It's become a staple in today's time. Now, whenever people see a mask, their immediate thoughts are either "That guy's a creep!" or, if they're involved with Them, "NOOOO, PROXY. NO, PROXY, PLEASE, PROXY, NO. NO. NOOOOO!"

Okay, not in those specific words. That'd be horrible and uninteresting.

And funny.

Back on topic! We finally have some development. His dad hates (read: hated) him! Well, didn't care for him, anyway.

Okay, screw this. It's boring. I'm taking a look at everyone's comments last time.

Aww, DM thinks I'm what Smokestack (By the way, I'm totally calling dibs on that name) calls the young virus. Naw, sugar, I'm pure ME. Oh, and Blair says hello. Or would, if s/he were still alive. AHA. AHA.

INSANITY, I thik you need spellcheck! Har-har!... But really, we'll get along very well.

Wayward, I resent that accusation. I haven't changed a thing. Well, I haven't changed a lot of things. Well, I haven't changed a lot of things... yet. Come on, how could I not get involved? This town is ripe for the picking... Is that how that saying goes?

Look. Doesn't matter.

Like it or not, I'm here to stay. This town... oh, it has such a history. I love it. Just last year, good ol' Whispers shows up and kills Sarah's daddy and sets this entire thing off!

And this is only the beginning. :)



Tuesday, October 16, 2012

- Stories -

Oh, humanity… How it makes my skin crawl. Among other things, of course, but humanity is such a curious and unique thing. Did I mention disturbing? You all can’t agree on the littlest things, can you? And that escalates, escalates, escalates… and pop! Like a balloon, the anger goes off. The trigger has been pulled! Can’t take back those words now. It’ll take a while to repair any damage you’ve done.

One side views a pedophile as a horrible monster that needs to be put down. The other side blames the young men and women, saying they should know better than to trust a guy they met online. Which one is right? Where does the blame fall? Now, now, don’t look at the United States’ Government to give you the answers to cosmic rulings. C’mon, now.

Here’s another one for you Pyrehearts: Girl gets manipulated by a guy and forced into having sex with him. This changes her entire world, to the point where she’s not even recognizable anymore. She’s manipulative herself, doesn’t trust anyone… speaks harshly to people she doesn’t know that well. So, whose fault is that? The guy’s, for extorting sex and turning her into that? Or is it the girl’s because she didn’t get over it, didn’t do the mature thing and be safe about who she spent time with?

How about a teen that gets pregnant because she thought she was in love? Maybe the guy thought so, too, I don’t know! But do either of them deserve the hate they get, or should they be helped because they made a mistake? Some would argue that it was justice, y’know? But maybe it’s a learning experience! Ahhh… who are we to say, am I right?

Let’s put it this way. Humanity is… special. Like clay! Your minds are so easily molded that it only takes a short while for these, ah… what do you call them? Fears? (That is such a terrific name and I applaud you forever and ever!) It only takes a short while for them to go to work on your minds, and suddenly they’ve either broken you into pieces, allowed you to live in return for ‘service’, or you’ve run off with nothing but your laptop or cell phone and a backpack. Sometimes, not even that.

To you, there’s no gray lines. There’s only the good and the bad. You concentrate on your differences when you’re so alike. One side condemns the other, the other condemns the other side for condemning. It’s a never-ending process that humanity will go through until it destroys itself. And that day is coming.

Here’s a final one for you to think about. A guy gets involved with this girl, you get me? They talk, get relatively close. Or the guy thinks so. So, he sacrifices secrecy and lets her in on a lifelong secret, one that’s caused a rift between him and the rest of his family (which, consequently, affects everything else - go figure). He tells her this secret, and she promises to keep it.

But then he starts blabber-mouthing about her little boyfriend, and she realizes it was a mistake talking to this guy. In a fit of anger, she releases the guy’s secret, telling the world that he accidentally killed his younger brother by leaving him in the woods when the older got angry. Makes it out to be murder, you get me? And everyone and their mother eats that right up, making fun of him, saying he should kill himself, too, some even suggesting that he’s killed a few people already! *GASP*

Things quiet down because, really, who gives a crap about this nobody, am I right? Well, turns out they were paying attention to him STILL - Get a bloody life, come on! - because about a month and half later he pops up with some retaliation, revealing that Little Miss Secret Keeper has a few skeletons in her closet. Bang, whole school lights up and he gets out of the “Screw You” spotlight. It’s vengeance, right? She deserved it! He’s in the right!

But some people don’t think so! Oh, nononono, don’t get me wrong. In fact, some ‘white-knights’ think that they can wield punishment in their own hands instead of leaving it to their betters. Obviously it’s retribution for what he did, right? Yeah?

And, well, I think you can kind of guess the rest. Not very subtle, am I?

You can choose which one's in the right and which one's in the "Screw You" spotlight; I'm merely an observer.

Vinny-boy, I am terribly sorry for jumping onto your account. But hey, you have to keep your audience entertained, am I right? And boy, this is gonna be a good show. Just you wait, people – big things, and I mean big things, went down at the hospital on Sunday night. I was there, of course, but why I should I spoil things for you? Its better coming out of Smokey Vin’s… eh… mouth?



Thursday, October 11, 2012

There are some days when I feel like giving up. Doesn’t matter why sometimes, I just feel that way. Little comments some people make, the glances I see out of the corner of my eye… They’re not imagined. I know they’re there, but people don’t want to hurt my feelings. Well, some do, but I expect those people to most of the time. Somebody said I was a moron because I looked like someone they knew. I’m not kidding.  Wish I was. But it didn’t bother me for long. I got over it, I swear.

But it’s the perceived slights, the ones that you don’t hear about until later. The little negative comments that get around, warping people’s opinions about each other. In my sophomore year, people were talking about a guy who was just eccentric, but they made him out to be some sort of freak. He wasn’t. I mean, my personality would have clashed with his, so I didn’t really talk to him. But I refused to say anything mean about him because I knew what it felt like to have others talk about you behind your back. I think every highschooler has something like this happen to them, though; we all hear something that someone said about us behind our backs, and it’s either good or bad. Nothing ever in-between. I mean, you’re not going to say something like “I consider his hair to be a good color, but an improper length”. You can’t be neutral for long.

Anyway, this gossip stuff. It got back to the guy, right? And even though he had a group of friends who cared about him, even though he had people to hang out with, it still got to him. Months down the road, he ended up overdosing because of all the little stuff that built up over time.

I’ve witnessed this a few times in the past year. Not necessarily to the point of suicide each and every time, but one or two cases. I’ve contemplated suicide before, actually. Still do, since it’d be a way out. Just the little things that pile up, you know? And it’d be so simple for me to do it, too. Just jump in front of a speeding vehicle, or take a butcher knife to my wrist. Chop, chop, chop. Maybe take a lot of painkillers and overdose like Eccentric Guy.

Sad thing is, it won’t make people learn their lesson. Every time someone dies or takes their own life, people are sad for a time. And then people start sharing negative stories about them, saying stuff like “It wasn’t my fault. He/She just had issues and needed to talk to someone, gosh”, but they don’t really care, you know? They wouldn’t just walk up to someone and say hi, how’s it going? Want to sit with us?

And it’s not the people you think it is, either. The “popular” crowd – a few of them will talk to you, but not a lot. The little do-goods that say they want to help people rarely do. The ones who joke around with each other might include you, I guess. Depends if you take part or not. The people who don’t care about school, well, that should be obvious. And the rest… heh, they all have their own little groups…

That’s one of the reasons why I like Daniel. He approached me, saw that I needed help. He’s not the best influence in the world, but neither is my father, okay? And at least Daniel will give me a time of the week. “Hey, want to come on over and watch some movies?” “Sure, why not.”

And even though it’s been almost a month, I kind of feel like Daniel’s the brother I would have had. I mean, we’re a lot alike, though he’s more adventuresome. who cares, yeah. Oh, bullcrap, people do care. i’m just saying maybe they don’t okay. But people tell me Daniel is the bad guy, telling me that I need to stay away from him. But what defines a bad guy? The antagonist, yeah? Well, I’m the protagonist of my story, so who is my antagonist? Everyone else, the ones who have rejected me, who have placed people like me as beyond saving? Worth finding out.

Lois isn’t an antagonist, though. I thought she was, and then I brought her down to my level. I was wrong in that. I humiliated her, did to her what she did to me. that does not excuse what she did of course. Maybe not, you’re right, but it was bad of me to do that to her.

Just proves my point that as humans we will fail time and time again. We’re inherently evil, giving in to our base desires if we let ourselves slip that far. I did, and it’s brought me so far down. Heh, isn’t that right? it is.

The world’s cruel. You can’t change that fact. I’d like to make it into a universe where it’s all nice and happy and everything is peaceful. but that depends on your definition of peace. Maybe it’s simply being alone in your own personal paradise. Maybe it’s with other people. I don’t know.

But it’s not what I want. not anymore.

Personal philosophy.

am i speaking in understandable ways? Who cares. We’re getting this done, we have to.

It’s not about what I want. I understand that now. We have to provide fair ways, give them chances. but we have so many times, so many times. Just do it. Lie. lying can be good in proper circumstances.

He’s surprised? is that a question but of course. Aha, he doesn’t know what to say. I wouldn’t, either, if I were him. to suddenly here the boy asking for lessons is quite strange. He hasn’t been much of an influence on me, though. A positive, at least. get it over with.

We’re going downstairs, yeah? That’s where he keeps them, and that’s good. We’ll have what we need. Daniel would like that, I bet. Vivian and the rest of the group would like it, too. but its not for them. It’s not? Of course, I’m right. We don’t need them for now, but they need us. What comes next?

Right, the cabinet where they’re locked up. Don’t want someone hurting themselves. like before right. Yes, like before. Was it eleven years ago? i was not here so i cannot tell you. But I was here. Blood, you know, gets over everything. We had to move houses because of it. I don’t like blood. i think.

He’s letting me look down the sights at it. I know how to use one of these, dad, I’m not stupid. Just point, aim, and shoot. Bang. see daddy? We know how to use it.

The world is evil, okay? We try to suppress it, try to cover our vices… maybe it takes some more effort than others. But we all have that darkness inside us, just waiting to spring out. just waiting to take control. Bang. I don’t know how I feel about it, really. But this is the proper term of events, about what’s fair. he deserved it just like lois deserved to be shown what humanity is really like and why humanity deserves to die. We war with each other all the time, bringing out evil in each other. The ones who declare war don’t fight, do they? Not anymore, at least. but it was not always like that back then honor used to mean something. But not anymore. Hate is a more powerful emotion, stronger than fear. you can do so many things with both, but hatred burns deep, decaying the heart until it is withered down to nothing like itself a changed being.

what i find funny is that we say that we lose our humanity when we become monsters but i disagree because humanity is a monster at its very core.

we fight amongst ourselves because it is in our very nature.

bang. bang. bang.

stop with the flashing lights already. Neighbors? None, thank you.

how many times shall we point out the obvious humanity needs to be destroyed so that everlasting peace may be placed on this world. But is that what we want? to have absolute peace you must first have war and without war nothing will change and none shall learn their lesson.

Lessons need to be taught.

Of course, it was staring me in the face the entire time.


Lessons are important, and Lois’ isn’t done yet. She knows what it feels like to be half of me, but the other half, the part that was buried, the part that came back? She hasn’t experienced a loss of life. Let’s even the playing field out. she will know what a death will feel like and what it will feel like to be held responsible.

then it will end. then the payment will be due and she can be forgiven and other lessons taught just like the ones tonight. father and mother know better now do they not. and the neighbors will be sure to stay silent next time i am sure.

hurry they will be here any moment. I just need to grab a few things. Obviously we’re taking this and father’s gift, but I want something else. A gift from mom. what is that? She made it for me a few years ago. Tried to make it a ninja mask, but it came out like an executioner. fitting. I thought so. Getting a backpack together. Are they even out tonight? who cares the response time may be bad at this time of night. Just getting this taken care of.

right. we are ready.

I think so.

we know so.

time to play lois.